My Wife Just Said… #141
“My hands are fah-reeeeezing! Oh wow. Your balls are so warm!!! Don’t jump away! Oh please let me warm my hands on your balls?” -Elizabeth Um. Okay so yeah… WOW! That’ll take you from tired to light-speed wakefulness like nothing else! Even if you’re in a coma. Or dead. Notes to self: 1) never […]
5 Ways New Year’s Eve Is Just Like Being a Parent
We made it. Most of us. We made it through 2013 and we are birthed into a new year like screaming babes covered in slimy goodness into the arms of our mommies, another January. But if you’ve spent a night of debauchery ringing in the new year, I’m here to tell you: you’re qualified to […]
