Month: March 2016

I Am A Pig With A Cookie

Posted under VIDEOTAPE

It’s Wednesday and you know what that means, right? No, really. What does it mean? I have no idea. I just know it’s the middle of the week and I’d really like to sleep in, or go to sleep early. But I digress. All I want to do is go full hermit mode, have a […]



21 Next-Level Videos of Pulling a Kid’s Loose Tooth

Posted under VIDEOTAPE

If something’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right. And I say if it’s worth doing right, it’s worth doing weird! Teething was such a torturous ordeal, so it feels right that there should be some fun and celebration in those little pearly bastards falling out, when it’s time. When a loose tooth is practically breakdancing […]



Parenting Summed Up In 9 Seconds

Posted under VIDEOTAPE

If you ask any parent how they see themselves in the job of guardian of their kids, they’ll probably tell you it’s pretty thankless. Sure, there are moments of rewarding feelings and on the off-chance your kid actually says “thank you” or “I love you” or just “HELLO DAD” — it feels pretty amazing. But […]



Superhero Tears

Posted under SNAPSHOTS

The gorgeous illustration style of this “comic” by Jon Laing caught my eye the other day. Reading the first frame, it was clear the weight of the story was heavier than a lighthearted joke. I felt sympathy for a bullied child and empathy for the defensive fantasies that come of idolizing one’s dad. My eyes […]



Weird Celebrity Parent Moments!

Posted under VIDEOTAPE

I’ve often told people that I’m pretty excited/terrified to hear all of the ways my kids will one day interpret my parenting. Every day, I’m arming them with a golden nugget of an opportunity to blackmail or otherwise extort me. It’s part of the payoff of being a dad. The more engaged you are in […]



Kid Vomit Target Probability Chart

Posted under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Kids seem to have a kind of horrible instinct mixed with a curse of bad luck. A kind of Murphy’s Law born into them. Mysteriously, critters of the wild are pre-programmed with certain knowledge and skills. A male dog lifts its leg to pee without ever seeing his dad do it. A weaver bird crafts […]



My Wife Just Said… #255

Posted under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“You know the expression about ‘the two certainties in life: death and taxes’? When you have a kid, there are two more: dishes and laundry. Hmmmm… This could be a really long list.” ““Elizabeth That list could get soooooooo long. The internet has a bunch of jokes about the failed promise of hoverboards and flying […]



9 Things New Parents Aren’t Quite Prepared For

Posted under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

All first-time parents try to study “what to expect” and prepare for the arrival of their first-ever munchkin. But even the most forward-thinking parents are bound to have some unexpected experiences, and even some unanticipated reactions to things they totally knew were coming. They’ve readied themselves and the home for the big day as best […]



13 Hilariously Confusing Knockoff Star Wars Toys

Posted under SNAPSHOTS

I may not be the most knowledgeable Star Wars fan of all time, but I know what’s what. I know the difference between a Wookiee and scruffy nerfherder. And I covet nothing more than Star Wars toys. So it was hilariously ridiculous when I found these knockoff toys around the internet. I mean, just look […]



Pizza Is Its Own Food Pyramid (3 Comics)

Posted under NOTEBOOK

When I was a teenager, I could eat an entire large pizza by myself. Not a (violent air quotes) “large” pizza, but an honest-to-hugeness LARGE pizza. It took time, of course. And probably a violation of the laws of physics somehow. Heck, I love pizza so much, I once flew back from New York with […]