Our reliance on our phones has made us pretty terrible about tracking certain things. For instance, I can pretty much only remember my own phone number and 911. I might be able to guess about 5 or 6 digits correctly in my wife’s phone number. It’s the same with directions. Google and our map apps […]
For people who can fall asleep nearly anywhere (in any position, at any time of day, while doing anything), children sure can be impossible to put to sleep. They’re like little dozing narcoleptics who also have terrible insomnia. To say this is frustrating for parents is like saying the sun is a bit toasty. Sure […]
Job Title: Parent (Mother / Father) Department: Human Development Hours & Schedule: 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year Location: Everywhere Job Description Updated: Hourly Position Summary The care and feeding of a miniature human. Backbreaking and mind-numbing manual, mental and emotional labor. Keeping your cool under pressure, exhaustion, overload, […]
My dad was a master of the cheesy pun decades before the world coined the term “dad joke.” One Christmas a present from him was unwrapped and it was a tiny planet Earth completely covered in glued-on pees. He wanted to give the best gift that anyone can give: world pees. The entire family groaned […]
There are so many memories you collect in the raising of your mini human. They’re not all equal, though. To put it figuratively, some of them are just poorly jotted down in pencil you can’t even read later, some are painstakingly written down with a pen, and some are recorded with a permanent marker in […]
As a kid, I was given several impressions that didn’t quite pan out as an adult. When you’re growing up, your head is soaking up everything like a good little sponge. Or maybe a lollipop that fell under the couch. It can come from rotting your brains on cartoons, shows, commercials and movies, or from […]
Much to my fatherly delight, my son has grown up into a 7-year-old who loves action figures. As an aficionado myself, and the one who has to pay for the dang expensive things, I’ve taught him to pay attention to how articulated they are; how many joints they have and how poseable they are. The […]
I partnered with Plum Organics for their Do Your Part(ner) campaign. Isn’t it romantic? Before this Valentine’s Day swept us all off our feet (or plopped us onto a cozy couch to pass out), I teamed up with Plum Organics for my hopefully-funny Realistic Love Notes for Parents to help launch their Do Your […]
Whether it was the book or the films, a lot of us were sad when we came to the finale of the Harry Potter series. We got a brief glimpse of his future, older, married with kids, and were left to wonder to ourselves about the rest of the adult life of the Boy Who […]
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