Parenterms: “Fridgetful”
Parents know that they can often have memory issues, even if they can’t remember exactly how they even know this… uh… what was I saying? Something something… memory issues then… uh… whatever. Must not have been important. Sure, in addition to the fridge, there are tons of other “why the heck did I come here” […]
Parenterms: “On Purpaccident”
Kids do things. Always. Let’s all admit that the mind of a child isn’t a just blank canvas or a field filled with giggling unicorns. It can be a pretty weird place and result in some pretty disastrous things. At a certain point kids start to get the idea that accountability plays into the some […]
Parenterms: “Sprintercourse”
Tick tock, tick tock. The clock is ticking for parents. Always. For something. Everything. Raising kids is a game show that starts with “hurry up” music playing, and it never stops. When it comes to making time to make some love, it’s so often the expendable scene that winds up on the editing room floor […]
Parenterms: “Awkwurchase”
Some people experience buyers remorse as they are buying something. Sucked into the inescapable gravitational pull of the purchasing process, maybe they feel they’ll look like a moron or worse, a poor person, abandoning items in front of store clerks and their fellow shoppers. Always watching. Always judging. “Ooooooo you grabbed a pack of size […]
Parenterms: “Douchebaguette”
They exist. Douchebaguettes. The B word is rough, though. And the C word is just wall-to-wall taboo unless you’re Irish and referring to another man, in which case it can count as breathing with sound. When you have kids, there’s a mental censor that tends to go into play, even if you’re a d*mned total […]
Parenterms: “Pajdrama”
Parents know: you can lead a horse* to water**, but you can’t make them drink***. * kid ** bed *** sleep Trying to saddle up the stubborn little pony that is your child with pajamas is occasionally only a little bit less impossible than getting them to close their eyes and go to “for reals” […]
Parenterms: “Dadgerous”
Not everyone is handy just because they have hands, but when you become a dad you may find yourself suddenly possessed of the desire to build stuff. Even if you don’t have the desire, you’re still possessed in a way, like one would be with a demon. Possessed with some or all of the duties […]
Parenterms: “Smellcheck”
Every trade or specialty has its own set of unique words and definitions. Parenting is a highly technical job. Anyone who has ever seen an airplane’s control console, with it’s floor-to-ceiling constellation of buttons and switches, has looked at a metaphor for parenting. In this new series, Parenterms, we’ll explore and clarify the specialized terms […]
