Protect Your Kids AND Yourself
Parents have to protect their kids from harm all the time, and, ironically, they also have to protect THEMSELVES from their kids. LEGO landmines, sick sneezes to the face, roundhouse kicks to the head. No joke, I have three friends that have had their noses broken from a bobble-headed toddler giving them a surprise head […]
STRESSTIMATES
When someone says “parenting is stressful,” you almost want to construct a big sign on a stick that says “DUH!!!” and hit them over the head with it. Yeah, water is wet; sugar is sweet; parenting is stressful. WHACK! By default, it’s literally our job to worry and obsess about our kids’ well-being. So it […]
QUIZ: 9 Alcohol Cheats in Animation
Brought to you by responsibility.org for their TalkEarly campaign. In the past, animated films and shows were, um… rather boozy. A review of every G-rated movie created from the 30s up to 2000 said 47% showed alcohol consumption, and in that same period about 9% percent of all cartoons did as well. That’s a LOT […]
My Wife Just Said… (Zipper Struggle)
It’s hard to have a grown-up discussion with your wife when your fly is down or your shirt is inside-out. But it can be done! I’m living proof of this. Frequently. The trick is to compensate by using big words and deep philosophical concepts. For instance, you can say, “It’s an entirely admissible error to […]
STRESS & Don’t Wake Daddy Game Time (Funny Video)
Some games are intense and can get pretty stressful! Often the results can be very very funny. But life can be incredibly stressful. The kind you live, not the board game LIFE (that one’s pretty tame). I feel like now, more than ever, it’s an important part of parenting to make sure your kids are […]
Anti-Kid-Sharing Snack Packaging
It’s almost magical how kids can suddenly appear at the tiniest crinkle of a plastic bag. But it’s that crappy magic like a bad luck curse or the summoning of demons or evil spirits. We’re adults. We have earned the right to have our OWN snacks. Without our kids making us feel like we’re wearing […]
4 Parenting Clichés that Need to Go Away
There are expressions and jokes that become common catchphrases, buzzwords or clichés you hear all the flippin time. They can get reeeeeally old, or they just sucked from the very start. They’re like that fart joke your kid told that may have been funny the first time, but after the ensuing hundredth telling (within an […]
The Birds and the Bees… and a Swarm of Bees Challenge???
When it comes to having “The Talk” with their kids, parents can range from super-chill whatevs about it, to something that doctors would write down on a clipboard as a coronary event. I kind of get the sense that the average experience sits closer to the heart attack than explaining it casually while making a […]
6 Awful Relaxation Tips for High-Stress Parents
Parents are some of the most stressed out people out there. We even stress about how stressed out we are. Stressception. Y’know, there’s that whole saying about how when you have a kid “your heart forever walks around outside your body.” Let’s go a little further. Imagine you literally had a heart that beat outside […]
“Let’s Make a Deal!” -Kids
I walked into the living room and straight into an intense parent/child negotiation between my wife and our 8-year-old: Wife: No more apple juice, you said your tummy hurts. 8yo: It’s not hurting. Wife: 100% not hurting? 8yo: 50%. Wife: [stern look] 8yo: Okay 75% not hurting. [raises eyebrows hopefully] I wrestled my chuckle into […]
