Maybe moments don’t ever really happen in slow motion, but some are as slow as Neo’s bullet-limbo when replayed in the theater of the mind. So…

The family was gathered around the dinner table to play Go Fish. Cody said, “Let’s do voices!” A family tradition where we all adopt an accent or character’s voice and play the entire game out thusly. Lizzie suggested that we all do characters from Star Wars. She got a loving gaze from me, of course.

Max leapt from his chair, run up to his room to come bounding back down with his Clone Trooper helmet on.

He sat down and said something commanding with an accent like an Aussie who had spent too much time in New York and the Philippines. Amazing.

So, I became Darth Vader and Cody was Yoda. Lizzie went with Princess Leah, which is harder than you think and consequently hilarious to hear attempted. The first game went to Yoda, with much peanut-butter-stuck-in-the-throat chuckling. The Force was strong with me for the next round. Oh, the lines! Oh, the laughs!

Max started pressing the button on his helmet and threw in commanding gestures with his arms to match the pre-recorded Clone Trooper dialog from the movies. We were all in stitches. Then, taking it to the next level, Max stood up. He took off the helmet and our eyes followed him as he moved to stand behind his brother’s chair; center stage. He said, “Okay okay okay,” trying to stifle his own giggling at what he was about to do, “Watch this.” Here is where time starts to slow down…

I see Max grasp the helmet dramatically in both hands before him. He begins raising it up before him. We’re all watching in silence. He’s still lifting it up. Remember this is replaying slowly. The helmet finally rises over his head and seems to hang for a breathless pause before he begins lowering it ominously down over his face. The helmet finally comes to rest, seated epically upon his head. Then…

Suddenly, his bother’s leg lashes out with a ninja’s speed and accuracy and buries a foot in Max’s crotch. In slo-mo, Lizzie’s hands took a minute to fly to her face in horror as Max’s body tipped like a falling red wood tree. As Cody cackled triumphantly, my mind bounced back and forth between my stern disapproval and the desire to turn myself inside out with laughter. I bit my lip and decided to let Lizzie take it from there… as time returned to normal.