Listen, I’m not one of those old men sitting in his boxers on the porch spraying people with a hose as they walk all over his lawn.

Okay, fine.

I am, but with that completely aside, are kids today too coddled and catered to? I think the answer is “yes” and now I have unequivocal proof that today’s children are mindless zombies affixed with tractor beams from screens, electrical doo-hickey-hoosamawhatchits producing people incapable of imagination without intense amounts of stimulus.

To wit:

Back in my day, we only needed pieces of crappy foam packaged in a box and sold at 4000% markup with a cool commercial to get us excited. Sure, animals and young children probably choked on them, and no one really knew what their true purpose was, but they didn’t require overnight charging nor the downloading of in-app purchases.

No, these pieces of rubbish flew off the shelves because they held the promise of something fun with minimal setup. We had a hundred ideas for their use before we even held them in our hands. Was the toymaker unethical for packaging nothing and selling it for everything? Sure. But toys were less treasure and more trinket back then.

Did you have a favorite toy from your childhood? Post your favorite in the comments!

 
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