The thing about becoming the best dad… there’s no right way. There’s no perfect way. But I’m going to try and help you here. Read on for the real deal on how to become the best dad in the history of dadness. With a list of course!

1. I HAVE NO F*&KING IDEA.

Okay, just give me a sec. I had it and lost it. It’ll come back to me. Um. Okay, let’s press on.

2. SERIOUSLY, NO IDEA.

Damn. I knew what I was going to tell you and then I forgot it again. That happens when you’re a dad. Wait! That’s it. Forget all the advice you’ve been given. It’s probably conflicting anyway. Wait, is that it? DAMN IT.

3. YOU DON’T NEED AN ARTICLE OR A LIST TO TELL YOU.

Can you seriously learn how to be a dad from an article? It’s almost as bad as a site pretending to tell you how to be a dad or called ‘how to be a dad.’

4. NOPE. STILL NO CLUE.

Does anyone else have any tips? I’m trying to be a better dad myself.

5. ALRIGHT, FINE. THE ONE THING YOU SHOULD DO IS… NEVER MIND.

Let’s start by saying there is not one thing or five that will make you the best dad. In fact, being the best anything is a subjective game. Being better? Sure. Being the best? No thanks. I’ve met the kids of some motivational speakers. Yikes.

In the end, I want to give it my best. Some days are easier than other days. Some moments make more sense than others. But no amount of articles and internet searching will solve your challenges. Like art or Weird Al music, internet opinions can only be an opening to a deeper experience. That’s as much as the internet can offer. We can share a feeling or an idea so that we can make use of it in our own lives.

It’s a start, but it’s not much of an end, let alone means to an end.